The Gates of Life Returns in One Week.

Rumors have been flying for weeks now regarding "The Gates of Life," GameCola's choose-your-own-adventure fantasy story in which the fans get to dictate the path the story takes. Most of these rumors

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Rumors have been flying for weeks now regarding “The Gates of Life,” GameCola’s choose-your-own-adventure fantasy story in which the fans get to dictate the path the story takes. Most of these rumors have been started by me. OK, all of them. The point is this—TGoL returns next week, on Wednesday, September 14th! (That’s exactly one year to the date the last episode of TGoL went out.)

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Just like the last episode, this new TGoL will be both written and illustrated by GameCola’s Kate Jay, continuing the path that was set out in the first part of TGoL: Season Two. When we last left our heroes, Render had just arrived at his parents’ home in Trelenodora, discovering that his father was having tea and biscuits with Render’s former mentor, and now potential arch-nemesis, Captain Rothbury. You voted for Render to throw down his gloves and put ’em up, and that’s EXACTLY what he’s going to do. It may be a bloodbath.

To re-familiarize yourself with the story, check out the Season Two archives here. Or, if you’re feeling lazy, check out these episode-by-episode recaps:

Episode 1: Prologue – Captain Thomas “7-Eye” Render VI of Trelenodora had a revelation: He was tired of the aimless wandering he, Rivers Fusion, and Grand Master Barbarian Mage Enrique had been doing for the past several years. He wanted his life to have a purpose. He wanted a goal to strive for. Then he and the other two heroes were attacked by pirates. Enrique dispatched the pirates quickly, and Render had a second revelation: He knew what he wanted to do with his life…

Episode 2: Bad is Better Render, Enrique, and Rivers set off for Helpless Gnomes’ Island, to try to sate Render’s newfound life’s goal: death and destruction. [Thanks, readers!] Rivers was uneasy about this plan, so he stayed behind on the ship with Jonathan the Minotaur, another member of the crew. Meanwhile, Render and Enrique disembarked and sought out innocent gnomes to slaughter. Only things didn’t work out as they’d hoped, as the gnomes weren’t as innocent as advertised.

In fact, IT WAS A TRAP! The gnomes themselves had named the island “Helpless Gnomes’ Island” specifically to lure in and capture the sort of person who’d seek to slaughter their innocent brethren. Render and Enrique were caught, and it was up to Rivers and Jonathan to save the day…

tgol1_smEpisode 3: Why Rivers Isn’t the Captain – Render and Enrique had been captured by the not-so-helpless gnomes of Helpless Gnomes’ Island. Rivers tried to save his companions by using his fusion powers on the gnomes, but all he succeeded in doing was merging the gnomes with the forest itself and creating a crazed pack of half-tree/half-gnome monsters.

Thankfully, an accidental (?) explosion caused by yet another gnome killed all the tree-gnomes in a grisly fire.

Our heroes had no recourse but to board their ship and leave the island. They’d come there to sate Render’s bloodlust, but, unfortunately, there wasn’t much left there for him to kill. They set sail, but not before a wrench-toting gadget-monger stowaway had climbed aboard their ship…

Episode 4: Tick, Tick, Tick, Tick, BOOM! – Our heroes had just set sail from Helpless Gnomes’ Island in search of more life for Render to snuff out. There was a stowaway on their ship—they very same wrench-toting gadget-monger gnome they’d met previously on the island under unpleasant circumstances.

The gnome, Clyde, held a grudge against our heroes due to the above-mentioned circumstances, so he put his skills to use and blew a large hole in our heroes’ ship. Our heroes dove overboard, defeated a nearby gang of hostile singing seabears, and swam back to Helpless Gnomes’ Island to figure out what to do next. Clyde arrived shortly thereafter, and our heroes quickly deduced that he was the one who blew up their ship…

Episode 5: Build-a-Ship – Render, Rivers, Enrique, and Jonathan were stranded on Helpless Gnomes’ Island after the destruction of their ship at the hands of Clyde, the wrench-toting gadget-monger gnome. Unfortunately for Clyde, he was stranded there with them. Fortunately for Clyde, Render agreed not to kill him on the spot if Clyde would build him a new ship, one that was much bigger and much cooler than the one that was destroyed.

Render spent much of the night fretting about his life’s goal, and wondering about whether his quest to kill as many people as possible was giving his life the meaning he was searching for. By the following morning, Clyde had finished construction on a brand-new airship for our heroes. This was a delightful surprise. Render continued to not kill Clyde, instead recruiting him for the heroes’ next big adventure. After all, Clyde was the only one who actually knew how the airship worked…

Episode 6: Fly Away Home Render, Rivers, Enrique, and Jonathan landed in Render’s home city of Trelenodora to take care of some unfinished business. As the gang wandered through the busy market streets, Render unveiled his plans to fulfill his (new) life-long goal to kill people. Or at least, he tried unveiling his master plans. Rivers was increasingly enamored with the t-shirt vendors, while Jonathan and Clyde were distracted by other wares. Eventually, though, he did reveal who he was there to murder…

Episode 7: Avenging the Adventurer Our heroes set forth on a quest to defeat Captain Rothbury, Render’s former mentor and the man who committed the murder that Render was ultimately blamed and banished from his homeland for. Render hadn’t visited his home of Trelenodora since then, hoping to avoid an unjust punishment…until now. While Jonathan and Clyde were off buying supplies for the next journey, Render, Rivers and Enrique barged into the home of Captain Rothbury, only to find—that he was having a tea party with Render’s own father!

What was Render’s next move? That was for the Gates to decide…

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Look out for Episode 8: Killing Time this time next week! And don’t worry too much about going back and reading Season One of TGoL. We’re still not sure we even consider it canon, to be honest.

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