Great, now that I’ve got you suckered into reading a post about a dancing game…

Konami recently announced the spiritual sequel to last year’s underrated Dance Evolution (known as DanceMasters in North America). Boom Boom Dance will be released for the Xbox Live Arcade, I’m presuming before the end of the year.

By coincidence, “Boom Boom Dance” is also the name of an episode of Teletubbies, but as of yet there’s no confirmation regarding rumors of Tinky Winky’s presence as a secret unlockable character.

Although of course every member of the GameCola staff is excited, I’m the only person who actually expresses his love for dancing games.

The last console you’d expect to see a dancing game on would be the sausage-fest that is the Xbox 360, but Konami must have thought they could release a fairly good DDR on this platform.

They thought wrong.

Dance Dance Revolution Universe is so obviously Ultramix 4 with a new paint job. But it doesn’t even look as good as Ultramix 4. And there are almost no decent songs in this game.

So why would you own Dance Dance Revolution Universe?

Yeah, why would you?

This doesn’t even pass as a DDR title. The music is mostly synthy driven club-styled music, which isn’t what the series is about at all. I admit that some of it can be quite nice to listen to, but I’d kill for something recognizable amongst this trashy list (with a nice solid beat for me to grind my ankles to).

Boo!

To make the “Quest Mode” beatable, you have to turn off the background videos. Trust me on this; it’s a design flaw disguised as an “innovation.” You’ll want to do this anyway, to turn half-minute loading times into two-second ones. Doing so strips the game of most of its visuals, but results in making the game actually playable.

Of the ten downloadable songs, six or so are decent; but all of the DLC is already on the disc, like in Beautiful Katamari. And the PAL version has less DLC available than the NTSC versions, although the missing content may still be on the disc somewhere.

Also, the PAL version of Dance Dance Revolution Universe has an impossible Achievement: you can’t “clear all songs,” since one of the songs is missing from the main game as well.

All-in-all, this game fails to impress. The mat that comes with the game is of a really good quality, but that can’t make up for the appalling faults with the game itself and short-changing us with the DLC.

Should you buy it? No. If you have a PS1- or PS2-compatible dance mat, it’s better that you spend the extra cash getting hold of Supernova instead.

Some like it hot; others like it hottest. I like it when dancing games improve instead of being shoveled out to meet demands. I’m always skeptical when waiting for the latest DDR game, but also ready to lap it up like the sad little fanboy I am. I love Dance Dance Revolution and I love the music in the series. FACT.

DDR: Hottest Party 3 is the third Dance Dance Revolution game I’ve reviewed here, so I’m not going into gameplay detail. It’s been around for ten years, so if you don’t know the basics, you’re bloody slow.

Time and time again, home releases of DDR have offered sub-par soundtracks and song lists, ignoring the classic Konami songs in favor of licensed songs by well-known artists. Hottest Party 3 is no exception. You probably like dancing to songs you recognize from the Top 100 Billboard Charts, whereas I prefer dancing to what fans refer to as “Konami Originals.” (Once upon a time I preferred licensed songs over the Konami Originals; I guess I just grew up and wanted harder step-charts.) As well, covers have plagued DDR since the early days, and I feel they’ve really been a big problem since Pegasus totally slaughtered Linkin Park’s “Faint” for Supernova 2. While licensed songs may be here to stay, you’ll be happy to know that covers have hitchhiked with an axe murderer and will never be heard from again (hopefully).

She’s no Emi, but newcomer Jun is very cute.

Catching up with the PlayStation and Xbox versions (which have been doing this for years now), Hottest Party 3 shows music videos for the majority of its licensed song selection, altered to fit the 1.5 to 2 minute song cuts that the series is known for. Even “Pork and Beans” by Weezer makes an appearance with its associated Internet memes video.

The other licensed songs worth note are:

• “Just Dance” (Lady Gaga)
  • The song that invented the word “Doot-n.” Not to be confused with programmer favorite, Lady Java.
• “Boogie Wonderland” (Earth, Wind & Fire)
  • If you don’t know this one, your parents probably do, and did a shit job raising you.
• “Never Gonna Give You Up” (Rick Astley)
  • “Never Gonna Give You Up” has become an Internet anthem. I’m kinda sick of Rick Ashtray being the cigarette butt of everyone’s jokes.
• “Viva La Vida” (Coldplay)
  • I like Coldplay. Honestly.

Seeing as “Pork and Beans” and “Never Gonna Give You Up” are in this game, I think it is safe to assume that someone involved in the process of picking the songs is a fan of Internet memes. It’s too big a thing to be a coincidence, really.

This always makes me chuckle and miss a step, and it happens twice in the video.

Moving on from the songs, let’s talk accessibility. I was interested in jumping straight into the game, because when you’ve got a dance mat controller and a Nintendo Wii, you just want to dance. Also, you want the game to be easy to navigate. This one is, unlike the three prior.

The Free-Play mode allows you to jump straight into gameplay on any difficulty you wish, and now by default, the gimmicks are off. Also, the Wii-mote shakes have finally been removed from the main game. They didn’t work anyway and spoiled my perfect combos. They’re still available in Hypermove mode, which is not all that good…

My favorite songs, the Konami Originals, are fewer in this game than I’d hoped. This time, a lot of them are unlocked by earning DDR Points; the songs become available as you reach certain milestones. This means beating songs over and over again. The unlocks come perhaps a bit too slowly but they’re constant nonetheless. I would have liked something akin to the PS2 version of Supernova, where you could buy what you wanted to with the DDR Points, but that system was flawed too.

So far, this game sounds an awful lot like the first two installments of Hottest Party, so I’m going to clear things up now. The interface has vastly improved since Hottest Party 2, which recycled the first game’s menus, engine, and everything. The menus in Hottest Party 3 are clearer and simpler to navigate. When selecting songs, you now see the album art, something likely inspired by Rock Band 2. It is a lot easier to just jump in and play. Konami hasn’t simply dropped songs into the old engine; they’ve actually built a new one—one that works so much better.

Jun is very, very cute.

Hottest Party got off on its “max combo challenge” idea that wasn’t exactly cool to begin with, but with Hottest Party 3, this feature has finally been altered and rejigged to make you feel much more like you’ve achieved something. As you establish and then maintain a perfect combo, your combo count turns green and then blue. When you’re playing a song that doesn’t have a music video, the onscreen dancers will make character-specific motions based on your combo, resulting in a close-up and a big wide smile if you hit a perfect “Full Combo Finish!!”

Also, Dance Battles take center stage this time. Every few songs you play in Free Play, a boss character will appear and challenge you on a rock hard song, like with the “Max Combo Challenges” in Hottest Party 1 and 2. You’ll get them on whatever difficulty you’re playing, so if you’re a Basic and Beginner person, expect to unlock boss songs quicker. Merely passing a “boss song” isn’t enough, as you have to beat the computer player in order to unlock the song. The songs in Dance Battle are very difficult, and if you feel you’ve bumbled-through one, then you’ve lost, guaranteed.

There is also a Training Mode, but you can only play songs you’ve unlocked, so you cannot practice the offending “Pluto the First” before being thrust headfirst into it.

Hottest Party 3 also has your usual adventure mode that unlocks songs, and a “DDR School” for “all you first-time players,” apparently. I don’t see the need, because the Lesson by DJ songs are in this game, and they teach you the DDR basics just fine. They explain the ordering of steps and the association to left and right feet, as well as the gimmicks in the game, something even I picked up a few hints from.

It looks much better than Hottest Party and the sequel, even though the style is the same. Maybe that’s because the whole game has undergone a notable graphical overhaul. This is one of the many things KidzWorld was too blind to notice when they wrote their review like it’s the gospel truth.

There’s also all the other stuff you’d expect thrown in—the usual Work-Out mode and support for Classic Controller, if you’re too lazy to dance with your feet. Wait, didn’t I review a game for people like you? There’s also a Relaxed mode for players who just want to groove without having to score anything—which I think removes the need for owning the game. If you buy Hottest Party 3 for the Relaxed mode, you’ve obviously never heard of “dancing to the radio.”

If you’re a Wii owner, and you’re looking for the “hottest” Hottest Party, it’s Hottest Party 3. I heard a rumor that you cannot get it solus in America, but I’m sure Konami wouldn’t pull a move like that without having considerably thought it through; I got it solus in the UK just fine. It’s missing a Mission mode, but I’m glad they included a Training mode after I moaned about the one in iPhone DDR being useless. A hard week of playing this game and I still haven’t discovered everything. I see myself playing this for another month, easily. If you’re just wheeling it out for parties, then I’m sure the appeal won’t wear off. Especially if you love Rick Astley.

…and I could have just said, “Like the first two, but actually good.”

“You’ve reviewed too many modern games!” OK, OK, I understand. Not enough bleeps and bloops and blops and bloppity-bleep-bloops and chim-chim-cherees. So tell you what, let’s go back to 1993.

1993. The year that Aika Mitsui was born, and the year that André the Giant died. Nelson Mandela won the Nobel Peace Prize—well, he shared it with Frederik Willem de Klerk, but in all honestly, I doubt you’re that bothered to check up on any of my facts. 1993 was a boring year and I’ve found it difficult to locate anything interesting that happened.

Hold on, Holiday Lemmings came out. No, not interested? Me neither. 1993 was the year Hudson Soft released Bomberman ‘93 on the TurboGrafx-16, though. Bitchin’.

Bomberman is one of my guilty pleasures. Ever since I was young, I’ve wanted to become the Bomberman Master. I wanted to B-DAMAN when it came to placing bombs. And I didn’t care how many years it took. How many times I had to be iced on Xbox Live to achieve my goal. How many stupid pieces of merchandise I had to buy and how many different versions of Bomberman I had to complete.

I had to become the Bomberman master. “I will become the Bomberman Master!” I cried from the roof of my house.

So glad nobody heard me, ’cause they’d be lining up to heckle me. You see, I gave up—and now I’m stuck between Dance Dance Revolution and the Lego games. It all went wrong somewhere.

Becoming good at Bomberman is a difficult task. Soon after vowing to be the very best, like no-one ever was, I found that my will slowly faded. I couldn’t continue playing the Bomberman games—they were mindless, jippery bobblecock. Place bomb, walk away, walk back, repeat. Find the door. Congratulations. Floor 2 of 50. The same damn thing.

There are a few Bomberman games that I can still play because I can enjoy them for what they are: genuinely awesome fun. Bomberman ‘94, aka Mega Bomberman, is obviously the best Bomberman game ever made, but if that’s a story for another time, then let us take a look at the game released the year before—the aptly named Bomberman ‘93. Why? Because it was a Virtual Console launch title! At the time, I had an Xbox 360 and Mortal Kombat 3, so Nintendo obviously had to fight back with something decent.

I did not know about Bomberman ‘93 until I had the pleasure of experiencing it on the Wii’s Virtual Console. Seeing as the only other decent game on there at the time was Super Mario 64, it wasn’t really a hard choice—I ended up getting both.

As the Wii is a multiplayer-centric console, my peers and I played the game for its versus modes and steered clear of the single-player options. Being the black sheep of the gang, I woke early one morning and crept downstairs. Turned the Wii on silently. Launched Bomberman ‘93. I heard rustling upstairs, so I quickly jammed my headphones into the television. I experimented with the single-player mode.

That was when I realised that what we had been neglecting was brilliant. I had been neglecting the amazingly fun story mode—amazingly fun so long as you’re doing well, that is.

Let’s be serious here for a second: this game is a Bomberman game. And down to the core, it is the same repetitive “kill all the monsters and find the door” gameplay. It is a tad more advanced than the original Bomberman—but how much is a tad? A tiny smidgen? A small drop? A measly iota? Yes to all three.

After all, Bomberman on the NES is boring after about Level 3 or so—and to think, there are like 50 stages in that game.

So what does ‘93 have up its sleeves, besides its armpits?

I think I distinctly heard some canned laughter.

For starters, ‘93 has an actual story (although weak), and its bosses have their own gameplay gimmicks. There still isn’t a lot to sink your teeth into, but level themes make the game stand out a lot more than the first Bomberman.

So I mentioned the gameplay quickly before; allow me to go into a bit more detail. If you know what Bomberman games are like, this will probably bore you.

A level is made up of blocks, walls, obstacles and enemies. Under only one block is the exit, which takes you to the next level. To use the exit, you must kill all enemies.

(If we’re being picky, Bomberman’s bombs actually capture the enemy monsters, despite the fact that we clearly see them explode).

You must uncover the exit and kill all enemies to progress. Whatever you do, do not bomb the exit! Just don’t.

I know you’re tempted to do it, but on your head it will be!

In each level there are also up to two power-ups or items hidden underneath blocks. These include skates that speed you up, remote control bombs, and a heart that allows you to take more than one hit before you die. The best power-up is the one that allows you to traverse over the blocks themselves, enabling you to glide around the stage with ease. Overall, these do not break from the game’s trends all too much, which is good for someone who expects every game to be boring and monotonous, like myself.

Bomberman ‘93 is like the latest FIFA (if the latest FIFA were actually a good game)—nothing has been taken away, and a few various things have been added. Even so, it’s still the same game, just with a few more gimmicks, so to speak. For example, tiles you cannot place bombs on, conveyer belts, warps, and blocks that rotate when you push into them. They make a nice break from the usual bland level design, but that’s still what it is: bland.

The game is roughly 64 levels long, which you can’t argue with. For an overall look at game length, I’d say it’s about 1½ hours to 2½ hours of playing time. The eighth level in each world is a boss, and there is a final set of levels that make up the last world once all eight are beaten. A lengthy game but beatable in one sitting, which is necessary, given its original system. It does, however, use passwords—which is very good considering that my attention span barely lasts two hours on a good day.

So ‘93 can be easily plowed through—and difficulty-wise, I’d say it picks up at about World 4, although it has tricky levels dotted here and there beforehand. It has a long learning curve, and power-ups soon add up (so long as you do not die and lose them). Staying alive for as many stages as possible will help you stack up the abilities, which you’ll need for the bosses.

If you die on a boss stage, you’re going to be at a major disadvantage when you respawn. Because there are no savestates on the Wii, you’re on your own here. Good luck!

Being Bomberman, the multiplayer is where the game truly shines. It’s classic, balls-to-the-wall Bomberman, where human and/or computer combatants face off to the death. It keeps all the gameplay aspects of single player with a couple of extra power-ups.

Get a few people who know their shit, and you’ll have matches that explode like fireworks. Cussing, ranting, raving and banter! Get a couple of drinks in and effectively piss yourself with laughter when someone grabs the bomber-diarrhea and slow-down diseases.

Pure multiplayer gold.

That is what Bomberman is about, and why I love the series so much. Grab yourself Bomberman ‘93, get some friends ’round (given they’re not all online friends), and get blasting!

If you do not have immediate friends, only a hardcore fan of the series should check out ‘93. Once you’ve played one Bomberman, you’ve played most of them. Going by the single player alone, you should avoid this game unless you love Bomberman so unfathomably much. If you’ve got people to play it with, then since it costs less than ten smackers, this game is well worth considering.

Now for something completely different: a review of an arcade videogame. You know, the big machines you pump quarters into?

This review does contain Emi Toshiba, so there is at least one good reason to read on (or at least, one good reason to stare at the beautiful screenshots, like you did with my Dance Dance Revolution S review).

Reviewing an arcade title requires a slightly different approach, because the quality of the hardware itself differs with each machine. If I complain that, say, part of the machine is very uncomfortable, that could just be part of the machine I played, not all of them.

Also, credits required and their value can differ between machines. This is because some idiot designed arcade machines so that their functionality could be tailored to the person hiring the machine. Why would you go and do that?

While writing a review for one specific machine could address those issues, it’s also a rather stupid thing to do—you’re not going to say, “Hey, that’s a good SuperNova,” and fly all the way over here to play it.

I have risen to the challenge of reviewing an arcade machine, particularly because it is one that I have played semi-religiously for nigh on five months now. Since I discovered its existence, I’ve been drawn to Bugsy’s (no, not Puggsy’s) for their SuperNova machine, and their comfy seating area ’round the back (seriously, it feels like 3 a.m. in that lounge, whatever time of day it is outside).

I’ve been there quite often—so often that the people who work there recognise me. On occasion, I travel there with my group of fellow-minded players, but more often than not, I’m in there by myself.

I feel like a lot people are watching, and I get that imaginary warmth on the back of my neck. Occasionally, you get the cute girl who smiles at you, or the guys who film you, and say they’ll upload you to YouTube (I’m still searching for that clip). But most of the time, it’s pretty quiet in there (not that business isn’t booming, just mostly that people are minding their own).

This screenshot contains Emi Toshiba.

The goal in SuperNova is rather simple. Hit the massive metal pads beneath your feet that correspond with the arrows that are traveling up the screen. This is all that is ever required of you, no matter which difficulty mode you’re playing.

The general setup of SuperNova is as follows: one credit for three songs. You can also insert one credit to play the tutorial, or one credit to play a round of “Nonstop.” To play a round of Doubles (which is just plain ridiculous), or to play against another player, you need two credits.

Doubles is a bit of a rip-off at two credits, as Pump It Up generally lets you play Doubles for only one.

Nonstop gives you a set of three or four songs, and when you fail, you receive Game Over. I don’t touch Nonstop mode, through fear of wasting my credit if I fail out on the first or second song. It’s a good mode if you’re looking for a challenge.

The tutorial, on the other hand, is kind of pointless. If you’ve ever played a DDR title, then you know what you have to do. There is no need to be dragged through it and waste one perfectly good credit.

The SuperNova machine separates songs out into difficulties. However, if you continue pushing the right selector on the front of the arcade machine, you can select a hidden mode called “All Songs.”Selecting “All Songs” opens up the wide, full selection of over three-hundred songs. If you’re looking to get your money’s worth, it is the mode you should always choose.

When selecting the song you wish to play, there is a hidden menu that can be accessed by holding the OK button rather than just pressing it. On this menu, you can turn on difficulty enhancers (why would you even want to do that!?), and also turn the Note Skin on (which makes it easier to see where notes are). You can also choose the character displayed on-screen, which is entirely a cosmetic decision (I always set the on-screen dancer to Emi).

This screenshot also contains Emi Toshiba.

The song selection is superb. It manages to cover many songs that I love from the series. Firm favourites of mine include Captain Jack’s version of “Centerfold,” “Dragon Blade,” Des-Row’s special remix of “Kagerow,” and “Love2Sugar” by Noria (from BeForU). In general, if you’re starting out but want to push your skills forward, you should be playing BeForU songs, as they’re generally quite fast but not too challenging.

Firm series staples return for this machine as well, such as “Dead End” and “Silent Hill” (the song, not the unrelated Konami game series). Songs from the PS2 compilations also make an appearance on this machine, such as “Your Rain” and “You’re Not Here” (songs from the Silent Hill series, not the two versions of the song “Silent Hill” that are also available in this game).

The song selection, as I’ve said, is spot on. The console versions of this series (which I prefer for their availability) always seem to contain songs that aren’t interesting or are just plain old dance music. Until the next DDR game is released (penciled for release Q2 this year—but alas, no sign of it yet), we won’t know for sure whether Konami has made the same mistake again. I pray that they don’t. From what we’ve heard, “Better Off Alone” is going to appear. Nice!

A few more things to mention on the songs—if you’re not into the music of Dance Dance Revolution, then you can’t play the game. Allow me to explain, as I’m not trying to sound like an asshole.

To hit the arrows, you gotta be able to hear the music and appreciate the music. It’s not as simple as 4/4, especially not once you’re on Difficult. There are underlying rhythms and syncopated steps, and the better you know the song, the better you’ll do. If you’re not into Japanese pop music, or synth-driven rave music, you’re going to have a hard time playing. The home releases are better for players who’d rather dance to things they know—but if you want to become good at this lark, you should be playing the “Konami tunes” on those games.

There isn’t much more that can be said for Dancing Dance Revolution: SuperNova. The game has what I consider to be the best interface and the best song selection. Of course, it’s also the only arcade DDR game I’ve played. Looking forward to a possible trip in the summer to test-drive Dance Dance Revolution X, which should be exciting.

For all it’s worth, Dance Dance Revolution is about good music, good fun, and being active. You know what? This kind of exercise really is good fun, and it helps take a chunk off your mind so you come back to whatever you were doing totally refreshed.

It’s going to crash back into fashion, hopefully, (if and) when the next game comes out (currently it’s up in the air as to whether it’ll be May or June).

“Dancing,” they call it. It’s more like smashing your feet really hard on a metal box in time with arrows that are barely in time with the music. The spacing for your feet on the dance machine is awful, restricting all possible movement across the stage. The music is always so hideous and disgusting. Super Eurobeat? There’s nothing “super” about it!

And what is with the really awful Engrish? Why would I want to play a song subtitled “Boy on Boy Mix”? “Wookie Wookie in the Kitchen”? What in God’s commonly mentioned name is going on?

The above two paragraphs are a satirical-yet-accurate representation of the Dance Dance Revolution series. While I feel the need to bash the series, I love the games regardless. I’ve always much preferred the home editions to the arcade games themselves,  mainly because the dance mat controllers seem to have much wider spacing, and you haven’t wasted a credit if you fail on your first song.

Recently, a “bowling-alley-ice-rink-come-diner” named Buggsy’s opened up near where I live. No, not Puggsy’s. This particular hideout for wanted criminals has something that keeps pulling me back there. No, it’s not the cheap heroin; it’s the Dancing Stage Supernova machine.

Dancing Stage—yes, it’s the European title for Dance Dance Revolution. Well, until Konami dropped the Dancing Stage title in favour of a series reboot. No actual sign of said series reboot yet, but hopefully it’s still in the cards for this year.

So how does all this connect to the game I’m reviewing for you today, my lucky peeps? Amongst the titles in this new-style DDR is an iPhone OS-based DDR, where you can make your thumbs dance instead of your legs.

I can’t imagine needing a finger workout, but there you go.

Following the art style that the DDR games have followed since Day 1, Dance Dance Revolution S (or DDRS for short) is definitely one thing: beautiful. Just look at Emi in the screenshot posted above. Go on, click it for the bigger version.

See? Like I said, beautiful.

As always with rhythm titles, the quality of the game boils down to its music. As much as the game is beautiful, it’s whether the songs are stand-out that matters.

While the soundtrack of DDRS is somewhat lacking, it’s always been that way with the home releases (besides X2—Lady Gaga’s “Just Dance” and Coldplay’s “Viva la Vida” were on that one). There is a moderately good selection of songs in DDRS, but there appears to be no more than twenty-odd songs in total, and not all of them are available in Standard Mode from the beginning. While they’re all great if you’re into the musical style that the series is known for, the only truly notable track for me was the Smile.DK and Naoki collaboration, “A Geisha’s Dream.”

But the only thing making “A Geisha’s Dream” stand out is the perhaps overdone cross-referencing of “Butterfly,” Smile.DK’s first song on any DDR machine, mainly by use of the phrase “Where’s my Samurai?”. Which means that the sole stand-out song in this game only makes a mark because it jerks off the fans.

The “S” in this game’s title stands for “Shake,” which refers to the game’s Shake Mode. This mode is equal parts the greatest and worst idea Konami has ever had.

You have to shake the iPod in the direction of the arrows as they rise from the bottom of the screen, instead of tapping them. I always turn this feature off when playing Tap Tap Revenge, because it is finicky and unsuiting. Konami is giving it a new, unwelcome home within DDRS’s Shake Mode.

But when it works, it doesn’t feel tacked on at all. In Shake Mode, by holding the iPod correctly, dancing as if you are on the stage successfully hits the arrows. 60% of the time, it works.

With the home releases of DDR, Konami felt it was necessary to include Tour and Career Modes, which served no purpose other than to unlock songs (and belittle your ability). When it comes to a portable title, this kind of mode would be the obvious inclusion—but in DDRS, the modes have been dropped! Konami, what is your problem?

If you have taken the time to unlock all the songs in Dance Dance Revolution Universe, then you used a controller to do so—it just isn’t physically possible with a dance mat controller. It is made for buttons—so removing the Career Mode in DDRS just seems like the most illogical thing that could have been done.

The Practice Mode included in DDRS does provide a platform for rehearsing your performances, but when it all boils down to the facts, it’s your fingers doing the work, not your feet. Given there is no Career Mode (yes, I am still sour about this), what need is there for this mode to be included?

A sequel of sorts, DDRS+, was released recently. It uses exactly the same engine, practically the same graphics and unlocks, but focuses on downloadable content. This removes even more of the home feeling of DDRS and makes the game more like Tap Tap Revenge, which is not a good direction for a rhythm series to go.

Dance Dance Revolution S will, for the most part, keep fans of the series amused. But it’s just DDR with buttons, and that destroys the whole point. Meant for casual bursts of maybe five or six songs a day, DDRS is not as meaty and feature-filled as a home port of the arcade titles.

If you buy DDRS, it’s solely because you’ve got money to blow and you’re just a sad, strange little Konami fan, like me.

What’s that? I have to actually move around to play this game? OK then.

Captain Eric’s Super Thumb says… Thumbs Down.

Fine fine, I’ll give it a SMALL chance, but I am not holding out much hope! When I was first watching people play this game, my first thoughts were “that really really looks too hard and not worth the effort.” Soon I learned it was even harder than it looked. HUZZAH! The gameplay is…well, I mean, I think everyone knows what the gameplay it. It’s pretty simple. Guitar Hero with feet, just it came out long long before Guitar Hero.

SO! Yes. The game. it’s incredibly hard and takes a lot of practice to know what on Earth you’re actually doing…but that doesn’t make it any less fun! At least, when you play it with friends it is fun. Alone? Well, let’s just say you DEFINITELY do not want to be the dude who plays DDR alone, and leave it at that. But if you have excess of energy and some nice stomping grounds, you should at least give this game a try. At least for five minutes. Though I’m not sure it’s humanly possible for anyone to beat THAT ironman mark I set.

Captain Eric’s Super Thumb says… Thumbs Up!

ANOTHER game that requires actual movement? BAH! Well OK—it’s only the arms this time. Not so bad…. ANYWAYS, Wii Sports has a wide variety of games; you got your boxing, your baseball, your tennis, your golf and your bowling! What more could you ask for.

As with most games that require you to act like a fool, Wii Sports is much more fun with others than solo. Boxing, for one, is very fun with your friends. I mean, who doesn’t want continuously knock out their friends? That’s right! NO ONE! Bowling is one game I can see some bowling nutcases loving and playing for hours and hours in a dark room, but that is probably saying more about what I think about bowlers than the game. It sticks pretty close to the actual sport of bowling and MIGHT be the only game of the five that sticks to the game’s entire length.

One game that most certainly doesn’t is baseball, where you only get THREE innings! What a RIP-OFF! Though, I do understand that most people do not share my love of baseball and three innings is more than enough to send them running for the hills gouging their eyes out. WEAKLINGS! They just don’t understand the game’s beauty! ITS BEAUTY I SAYS!

I suppose my least favorite of the five games would be tennis. I mean, it’s fun and all, but so are ALL the Wii Sports games! And it’s a lil’ weird moving two dudes around. It sort of creeps me out…. Hmm, I think there is one more…what game was that…hmm. Oh yes! Golf! Pretty sad that I couldn’t remember it YET just said tennis was my least favorite, isn’t it? Well, dem’s the breaks! Golf only goes three holes, which is more than enough while pretty fun and way easier than really going out and golfing.

These games are all pretty crazy—some don’t even require button-pressing! INSANITY ABOUNDS! But they should give many different kinds of people many different kinds of enjoyment. It definitely is a good choice for a game to be packaged with the WIIIIIIIIIIIIIII.

Captain Eric’s Super Thumb says… Thumbs Up!

Oh precious simple controllers, how I hath missed thee! Now, to really enjoy this game, you MIGHT (will) have to disregard its very childish atmosphere. I mean, while playing the game you definitely will be having fun, but when looking back and describing what you did it sounds pretty silly! Because, in this game, you will be playing a beloved game of FROLF! That’s right: frog golf. It is a lot like golf, only with a frog and a catapult instead of a ball. Oh, and the course is completely whacked out with tons of obstacles and traps and such! OH THE FUN!

So, basically, it is like a large scale minigolf course with catapults, frogs and weird characters. WHAT COULD BE BETTER! If you play the game with an open mind, you will most likely have a grand ol’ time! DON’T BE A HATER! PLAY!

Captain Eric’s Super Thumb says… Thumbs Up!

Dungeon Runners (PC)

Dungeon Runners is a free online PC game. Well, you can pay a monthly fee if you so choose—I did not choose to do that. Big surprise, eh? The game is a bit different than other free online games. I suppose you can say it is in a persistent world, but, really, the only places in which you interact with players who aren’t in your group is in the towns. The game plays a lot like Diablo…a LOT like Diablo. The graphics are a bit odd, but that is the way I like my graphics! So, basically, this game is a weird free version of Diablo with oddball graphics!

With me so far? GREAT! Well, then let’s get into characters. You can choose from a magic user, warrior or archer to begin with, and you only get one character. However, once you play there are not that many differences in the characters beyond their starting abilities. So you can run around and bash things with a huge club as well as zapping them with lighting if you so wish. Hack-’n'-slash at its, finest I says! OK, well, maybe “finest” is going a bit far, but the game’s still decent!

Captain Eric’s Super Thumbs says… Thumbs up!

Supernating Superdudes (PC-Web)

So is it fair to THUMB a game I haven’t really played in 2-3 years and that I’m not even sure is still active? HELLS YEAH IT IS! Superdudes is a Web site where you can play lots of stupid games and such to earn points and ranks and whatnot, but what I will be focusing on is the card game of Superdudes. Your rank in Superdudes determines what cards you have access to blah blah blah. I’m sure you can buy cards and whatnot as well, but, really, who cares enough about this game to do that? HA!

The game is kind of fun in itself. Each player has a certain number of hit points and selects the order in which to play his or her cards. The cards do various different things, with the most important of which being dealing and stopping damage. One person wins and gets the head of the loser for his or her collection. Pretty good deal. There is a lot of strategy behind picking which cards and whatnot, but sometimes it just feels all for nothing. The better cards you get the more likely you will win, so it is better to stick to battling people around your rank. That’s how it was back when I played, at least!

The game seems to STILL be going, which is kinda strange. It’s hard to tell how active the site is now—or if it is even still updated— but you definitely can still play. One downfall is actually finding active people to play against; there is no real way of knowing if someone logged on last week or last year. BUMMER

Captain Eric’s Super Thumbs says… Thumbs Up!

A very good example of this is Dance Dance Revolution.  Kids no longer have to be gaining weight as they play video games.  They can actually lose weight.  It can be very good exercise for people who don’t.  Since it’s a game, lazy kids might even be motivated to try it.  DDR has helped some people to lose up to 200 pounds!  That’s impressive considering that a lot of people say you will amount to nothing if you play video games a lot.  This shows that video games are useful, and can make a difference.

Bad things can happen, too, if you aren’t careful.  A 15 year old girl from my town had a heart attack while playing.  As long as you know your limits, this won’t happen to you.  The only thing you have to worry about is people walking by and making fun of you.

Erin’s Top 10 7 Favorite Videogames
Top Seven Games of A Simple-Minded Gamer
(who can’t even get 10 because she is pathetic)

7. Stargate (SNES): My dad used to make me watch the movie all the time when i was little.  Then we bought him the videogame.  I was brought up on it man!  I still haven’t beaten it though, Ra is really really hard.  Damn him.  The alien bombs almost get him and then one of his little flamey things gets you!  Anubus is a wuss though.  You can take him down in two seconds cuz he always stays near the top.  His only way to beat you is with those damn floating things he sends after you.  all in all a game that will suck you in!

6. Mario Party 4 (GCN):  why?  because sadly enough it is the only game I’ve ever played on gamecube.  But it was rally fun.  even though i lost.. shamefully.  because i have rotten luck.

5.  Bomberman (PSX):  Hahahaha!  This game always cracks me up because i get to blow people up.  I usually lose though, because i get trapped somewhere.  But oh man is this fun to play when you are really hyper.  Especially if someone else plays with you.

4.  DDR (PSX):  I love music, so a music oriented game is great for me!  Plus, what’s better than techno?  nothing.  i say nothing.  that’s all i can say on this one.

3.  ATV Off Road Fury (PS2):  lol, i don’t play the game right though.  I always go into the cross country and go off course and mess around.  That is Definately the best way to play it.  Especially with another player.  When you hit the force field you go flying!  haha.  yes i know, i am sad.

2.  Spyro the Dragon (PSX):  AWESOME GAME! at least for me it is.  I kick ass at this game.  I love it for some reason.  I’ve beaten all the game except the ones for gameboy and Enter the Dragonfly.  I don’t like the graphics on the new one.  But when you’ve beaten the whole game and are looking for some fun, chasing the sheep!  oh yeah.  definitely love it.

1.  Mario Go-Kart (SNES):  BEST GAME EVER!!!!  I don’t care about any other Mario Go-Kart versions on any other systems or anything.  this game rules the video game world!  In my world that is.  When you are really tired you can laugh for hours playing it.  I have so many memories of this game… way back.  *sigh*.  Definately awesome.  Nothing is better for me.  Period.