GameCola » Ender’s Game

Fabricated News: Call of Duty: Modern Warfare 2

Michael Gray — Sat, 06 Feb 2010 19:20:10 +0000

If you’ve been paying attention to the real news lately, you’ll know that the US military is selling $6 billion worth of weapons to Taiwan. China isn’t happy about this, because they’re worried the US is encouraging Taiwan to rebel against Chinese rule. This is one of those delicate diplomatic situations where the worst case scenario is literally World War III.

Of course, when gamers were informed about this real-world news, they immediately started thinking of Call of Duty: Modern Warfare 2.

That’s a game which is all about World War III. And it is the biggest money-making game of all time (mostly because videogames are ridiculously overpriced nowadays). In fact, didn’t that game make somewhere along the lines of…SIX BILLION DOLLARS???

DUN DUN DUN!!!

We here at “Fabricated News” launched a completely fake investigation, with surprising results. The US military is keeping tabs on the gamers who have the best Xbox Live scores for this game, just in case they’re needed for a real-life global emergency. In fact, the officers we spoke to, Major Anderson and General Graff, believe this is their best chance at finding the next Ender Wiggin.

“I think chocolate cake is more delicious than carrot cake,” Major Anderson has been quoted as saying, and we cannot help but agree with him. So rack up those Xbox Live points, everyone! You could end up saving the world!

Ender’s (Video) Game

Michael Gray — Fri, 21 Aug 2009 15:03:44 +0000

I was in a bookstore the other day, and I noticed that they’re promoting a new “children’s” version of Ender’s Game. How do they market this book to kids? By having a kid-friendly cover.

I couldn’t help but notice something odd about the cover for the children’s edition. See if you can’t see what I mean…

They replaced Ender…with Mega Man.

GC Podcast #11: Paul’s Beard is Awesome

Michael Gray — Sun, 07 Jun 2009 15:01:32 +0000

This edition of “The GameCola Podcast” features Michael Gray, Paul Franzen, and special guest star Marianne Fenwick. This one was recorded at the same time as The Big E3 Preview, so if you hear Marianne playing with puppies’ squeaky toys, that’s why.

Segment One: Versus Mode, in which we discuss about 50 topics.

There is cover art for Nancy Drew: Ransom of the Seven Ships.
Should stores be allowed to sell M-rated videogames to minors?
California passed Governor Schwarzenegger’s awesome new law.
Marianne refuses to let Michael make his point about Nancy Drew and licensed games.
Rock Band and Guitar Hero are different, apparently.
We start discussing why we don’t like GameStop.
We start discussing the episode of Doug where Doug graduates.
Check out more clips from Doug on the GameCola YouTube page.

Segment Two: GameCola News

Should GameCola start a Movember team?
Michael starts crying because the San Jose Sharks had the best record in the league in 80 years, but then they choked in the first round of the playoffs.
Paul’s beard gets fanmail.
We blatantly plug the GameCola YouTube page.
We start talking about Ender’s Game.

Segment Three: We Talk About a Game All Three of Us Have Played

Segment Four: Games That Are Coming Out

We discuss Wii Sports because Wii Sports 2 is coming out.
Indiana Jones and the Fate of Atlantis is being coupled with the Wii version of Indiana Jones and the Staff of Kings.
Should remakes have upgraded graphics?
We so need to discuss playing Virtual Console games versus playing the original games. Let’s get Myrtle T. Blinkin on the podcast.
Paul was disappointed by Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix, so he’s not looking forward to Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince.
This is the longest deleted scene included on the Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix DVD.
As Kate said in her review, Okami wasn’t good on the Wii.
Paul loved killing people in SimCopter.
Paul’s review of Zoo Tycoon DS was totally awesome.

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