My Girlfriend: Dooo de-do, I think I’ll just have some bananas for breakfast. Doooo de-do…
My Girlfriend: Bananas, yum yum, putting them on my plate, gonna eat themmm…
My Girlfriend: Bananas sure are great!!
I approach from the shadows.
Me: STEP AWAY FROM THE BANANAS.
My Girlfriend: Why.
My Girlfriend: Why would I do that, when I want to eat the bananas? You are confused, my boyfriend!
Me: LOOK AT THEM!!
My Girlfriend: …so what. They come with stickers for a videogame. So. Bleeding. What.
Me: These bananas do not just come with stickers for a videogame—they are advertising a videogame! Super Monkey Ball: Step & Roll, for the Wii!
Me: SINCE WHEN DO BANANAS DO THAT.
My Girlfriend: Since who cares?! I want to eat them!! Now!
My Girlfriend: GIVE ME THE BANANAS BACK, BOYFRIEND.
Me: NO WAY, GIRLFRIEND!!
I throw the bananas out the window.
My Girlfriend: This is a sad day indeed. 🙁
(Author’s note: Seriously, you try writing a blog post when all you want to say is “boy, it sure is weird that they’re advertising videogames on bananas!”)
this is not how the people in this story really talk!