Hacks’n’Slash, GameCola’s bad fanfiction podcast, returns with a selection of Phoenix Wright fanfiction! For the first time ever, I believe we have actual slash in Hacks’n’Slash. We also have some guy named Phenix Wright who vaguely resembles Phoenix.
Anna Bryniarski, Diana Gray, Michael Gray, Alex Jedraszczak, and Sean Laurvick get together and read these stories:
- “What If?”, a fanfic starring a girl who looks like a boy. She falls from a 25-story building in New York, which makes Edgeworth very sad. (00:00 to 7:04)
- “Visiting April”, a fanfic in which Maya Fey falls in love with April May. True, April May helped kill Maya’s sister, but that doesn’t mean the two of them can’t find each other incredibly attractive. (7:04 to 13:25)
- “phenix wright vs godot” and its thrilling sequel, “phenix wright vs godot 2: enemies become friends”. In these fanfics, someone named phenix wright battles miles edgreworth, as well as run-on sentences without capitalization. (13:25 to 20:45)
- “PHOENIX WRIGHT AND THE HORRIBLE DAY IN COURT!” by NekoJessica. Phoenix has a horrible day in court, when he goes up against legendary persecutor NekoJessica, who is beautiful and sexy and has a Russian accent. (20:45 to 29:17)
- “Phoenix Wright READ THE STORY TO FIND OUT”. Phoenix is in high school for some reason, and a girl with the same name as the author has a crush on him. (29:17 to 37:26)
But that’s not all! We had so much fun with NekoJessica that we decided to read two more of her stories. First is “The Untold Tale of Dennis the Menace”, which explains how Dennis got his name and embarked on a quest to destroy the world (37:26 to 44:09). Second is “troubled times in spiral mountain”, a Banjo-Kazooie story in which Kazooie turns evil (44:09 to end).
Are there any stories you want us to read on a future podcast? Is there a particular game or genre you think we should cover? Let us know in the comments!
Sample Quotation: nekojessica did a raelly cool animation and pointed at maya and said “You have no defense you pathetic lawyer!” and phoenix said “Objection!!!!!!!!” and everyone clapped and phoenix said “I have a defense” and she said “oh” and the judge looked.