Want to know what’s up with that cool-lookin’ game that’s coming out soon? Psychic Thumbs has you covered. (Note: The following are all real games that are really being developed.)
Well, it’s November, and, as you should all know now, here at the Thumbs that means absolutely nothing. Gimmicks are for the unimaginative! THE SHEEP! We need not foolish gimmicks here at THUMB Central. Just fast, hard-hitting awesomeness, which—guess what?—is exactly what you will be finding again this month! OH hellz yeah!
True Love and High Adventure: The Official Princess Bride Game (PC)
Everybody knows that 20 years after a movie first comes out is when its prime videogame-having potential is in full bloom. With that in mind, it is no surprise that a Princess Bride game is in the works!
Complete with a budget befitting of a download-only title, you should be expecting nothing but the most flamboyant graphics and high-tech effects from around the globe. One has to wonder how they can even pack all of the intense entertainment from that movie into a single game. All I can say about that is be careful what you wish for.
The short time I was able to channel this game with my powers, I was hardly even able to see it! The sheer amazingness just made my stomach weak and my knees buckle. I was completely blown away just by the mere thought of this game that I could not even take it for a test spin. When all of this comes from a simple videogame, you know you are in trouble—trouble of a monumental videogame experience that’s usually reserved only for religious wackos! Once this game comes out, it WILL change the world, and when it does just remember where you heard that first.
Captain Eric’s Psychic Thumb says… Thumbs Up!
Dragonology (DS)
If there is one thing that good nerds love, it’s words that end in “ology.” So, naturally, they are going to love Dragonology, right! I mean that’s an ‘ology about dragons…DRAGONS! How cool is that.
Well, that’s what you’re thinking until you learn that Dragonology isn’t just a cool word: In fact, it’s some book. Some ENCYCLOPEDIA book nonsense.
Yeah, well, the game could still be cool, right? I mean, a dragon encyclopedia…maybe you get to destroy dragons in alphabetical order or something—that’s badass AND educational! However, this seems not to be the case for the DS version of this nerd book. In fact, it seems barely to be a game at all and more of an interactive…book.
Seriously, what is up with this making things into videogames that don’t need to be videogames at all. It’s UNNECESSARY! But, if you enjoy reading but hate the fact that there isn’t a little glowing screen destroying your eyesight as you do so, then you just might find this game to be of great use! ENJOY.
Captain Eric’s Psychic Thumb says… Thumbs Down.
Bionic Commando (Multiple Systems)
Capcom just loves making money off of things they’ve already created, eh? Since they are already skyrocketing toward the two-billionth Mega Man game served, they thought that they would go in a different direction this time.
So Bionic Commando is getting the call!
Really? Bionic Commando? Was that even popular? Because I sure don’t remember it. I especially don’t remember anyone asking me if I remember how awesome it was. I DEFINITELY do not remember anyone reminiscing on the joys of it and exclaiming that they would just die to play an updated version of it.
However, those people must have been talking to Capcom, because here it comes! Bionic Commando is bringing us all his rad tools and such from his past game. Unfortunately for the Bionic one, this new title just feels too ancient and awkward in a new setting. He should have stayed in his zany 80s past, or whatever era he might have enjoyed his slim glimpse of popularity.
Captain Eric’s Psychic Thumb says… Thumbs Down.
Perfect Dark 2 (X360)
Now, if there is one type of game that we all need more of, it’s shooters. I mean, it is incredibly hard to find even one shooting game that anyone will even mention at all! We are experiencing some kind of lackluster shooter plague at the moment. I can not think of a single one that has people even remotely thinking about being excited over.
Thankfully, this lethargic take on the shooter genre is all but over with the coming of the NEW Perfect Dark. This game has EVERYTHING you could dream of! Guns. Ammo. Things to shoot. A busty girl to wield said guns and ammo! WOW! From start to finish, it’s just pure hedonistic glee, as you mow down all those you see unfit to live in your utopia. Not only will you be able to shoot and perhaps even EXPLODE baddies, but, since this is a game for the next-gen systems, it will look SO AMAZINGLY COOL! Like shiny guns and bouncy breasts!
OH MY GOD! Can you even imagine how cool that is going to be!! I won’t be able to leave the house for weeks, probably even months, once this thing is finally in my possession!!
Captain Eric’s Psychic Thumb says… Thumbs Up!
SimCity Societies (PC)
So, if you’re like me, you’ve been sitting in your meteorology class and thinking “boy, I sure wish all this global warming and energy conversation excitement could be bottled into a videogame! Maybe even a SIM video game. Yes, that would be perfect!”
OK, well, to be honest, I never really thought any of that. In fact, I was 
probably using the time I wasn’t thinking those things for nap time. Still, though the idea may sound pretty boring and uneventful, the game has its moments. It is a pretty new and refreshing idea, in fact. Something the videogame industry is not know for having often or…ever, really.
So, while you may be lusting after some large robot attacks or flash flooding to devour your town, manipulating different variables and seeing how they effect your own little town is pretty cool in its own right. It may SOUND boring, but, in practice, it is actually pretty entertaining, so don’t knock it until you try it!
Wait, did I really just say that? Knocking it before trying it is like my mantra. I must be coming down with something.
Captain Eric’s Psychic Thumb says… Thumbs Up!
Well, that is it for this month’s edition of those wonderful, MAGICAL, super PSYCHIC thumbs! Be sure to come back next month for more of the same completely mind-blowing amazement that you get here AT THE THUMBS every month.
