Blog fans with good memories will remember back in November when I asked if you wanted me to write a review for NHL 2008 or Final Fantasy VI (bet you all wish you had picked NHL 2008 now, right?).
Well, the review for NHL 2008 wasn’t chosen, so I decided to post it here as a blog entry, because it’s literally dated, so it wouldn’t work as a review anymore, anyway.
Minor Warning: I’ve never actually played this game. All I’ve done is seen advertisements for it played on the big screen during hockey games.
See, my family went on vacation to Chicago last month, and my sister and I went to see the Sharks/Blackhawks game on the 16th. I decided I would write some insightful comments based off the game trailer for GameCola, but then Michalek scored in the first minute.
My sister jokingly suggested that we drink a beer each time somebody scored. I agreed.
The final score was 6-5.
So my comments about the game trailer are kind of, um…bad. In fact, it’s pretty much copying the game trailer word-for-word. Anyway, here it is:
NHL Two Kate is the greatest game of hockey and playing. You can use the Wii-mote as a stick and check guys into the boards. With over three arenas and two, uh…thingies, it’s guaranteed to be most fun you’ll have all year. Play as all your favorite hockey guys, but not the girls. Girls don’t play hockey.
Q: Why don’t girls play hockey?
A: Because they have to change their pads between every period.
Ha ha ha, menstruation jokes are funny.
So now I guess I have to figure out what ratings to give the game, based off my review. Hmmm…
Fun: Apparently, it’s the most fun you’ll have all year.
Novelty: Wow! A hockey game! They’ve NEVER made a hockey game before! The idea of making a sports game is totally original!
Audio: At hockey games, the fans shout out things like “fuck” and “BULLSHIT!”. A lot. I’m pretty sure that doesn’t happen in this game, which means the audio is completely unrealistic.
Visuals: It looks like a hockey game.
Controls: You can use your Wii-mote as a stick, apparently.
Replay Value: Hmmm…I guess it has to have a lot of replay value, because it’s basically just playing a hockey game over and over and over again.
Overall: I could have used a few more menstruation jokes, to be honest.
Fun 6
Novelty 3
Audio 3
Visuals 5
Controls 7
Replay Value 7
Overall 6