Breaking Carbonated News, everyone! Super Mario Galaxy 2‘s release is imminent. IMMINENT, I tell you!
Shigeru Miyamoto, creator of Mario and the game’s main developer, has been making statements recently about how the game is almost done. Actually, it probably is done now. They were scheduled to release it in Winter 2009, but the game’s release was delayed so it wouldn’t interfere with the success of New Super Mario Bros We Will Remake This Game Until People Stop Buying It, And Maybe Even After That.
Speaking of remakes, Mr. Miyamoto said that Super Mario Galaxy 2 was originally supposed to be a remake of Super Mario Galaxy, believe it or not. They were thinking of doing something like they did with the never-released Ura Zelda  for the N64: same basic game, with various level tweaks and variations. It’s a good excuse to re-use all the things that they cut out of the original version of the game, after all.
Fortunately, the development team got slap-happy with the project, and they ended up making a bunch of new material. The official word is that it will have at least 95% new material. For the record, all this information was confirmed over six months ago, but I wasn’t paying attention then, so I missed it. That’s why this counts as news.
In the November issue of Wired, Mr. Miyamoto also said that this game will have less plot development than the first game. We here at Carbonated News are not sure to make of this, because there was no plot development whatsoever in Super Mario Galaxy. I mean, here’s the plot: Bowser kidnaps the Princess, and Mario has to go through outer space to save her. Also, there’s a pallette-swap version of Peach named Rosalina who has star friends and no personality besides, “You need to find all the stars, Mario!” How do you slim down a bare-bones plot like that?
Well, here’s how you slim down that plot. Instead of saying, “You need to find all the stars, Mario!”, Rosalina will say, “You need to find all the stars!” Aha! That’s plot reduction, by jingo! Now if only Mr. Plot Reduction will be let loose at RPG-central, we will see some pretty good new games this year, in addition to Super Mario Galaxy 2.
…Just don’t blame us if the game is delayed.