Guest review by: Maya Fey
Phoenix Wright: Ace Attorney is the best game ever, and I’m not just saying that because I’m in the game. I’m saying that because I’m the star of the game! I’m even on the cover! That is sooo cool!
It’s all about the adventures Phoenix Wright (I call him “Nick”) had during his first year as a lawyer. Nick is always saying that being a lawyer is hard, and serious, and no, I can’t ask the Judge to stop the trial so I can go get some burgers, and it’s totally against the rules for me to try to get everyone in the courtroom to do The Wave when things get boring. Well, Nick is totally wrong! I’d make a great lawyer, and this game proves it! I beat it on my first try, so there!
I mean, “Take that!” See? I would totally be a great lawyer!
The first case has Nick with my big sister Mia. She’s so awesome! They should make a game about her! Right after they make one about me. Ooo, what if they make one about me with her in it? That would be the best game ever! It’d sell like a million copies!
Anyway, in the case, Nick has to defend his friend Larry, and he learns all about lawyer stuff like checking the Court Record and cross-examining witnesses and pressing testimonies and stuff like that. Boring! Skip to the part where I get to yell, “OBJECTION!”
The second case is better than the first one, because it’s the one where I show up! I’m the best character in the game. It’s all about the time I got accused for murder (which happens to me, like, a lot), and Nick tried to be my lawyer and help me, but in the end, it was my awesome summoning skills that saved the day!
I decided to stick around and help Nick out at the lawyer office, because he’s totally lost without me. Plus, the TVs here have like 3,000 channels! The TVs in Kurain only have 20. I’m so jealous!
Speaking of TV, the next case is the one where we help the Steel Samurai, who’s the star of the greatest TV show ever! He’s obviously not a murderer because he’s the Steel Samurai, so he has to be good! So Nick and I got to hang out on a Hollywood studio set for a few days, which was so much fun, and in the end, my awesome summoning skills save the day again!
The fourth case was all about Mr. Edgeworth, who’s a prosecutor, but he’s also Nick’s friend, kinda. He seems kind of stuffy to me. Anyway, in the case, Nick defends Edgeworth, and he goes up in court against Manfred von Karma, who’s like the meanest person ever, except maybe his daughter and that one guy who said Apollo Justice was a good game. Hellooooo? Apollo Justice can’t be a good game! I’m not in it!
I’m also not in the last case of the game, which is why it’s the worst one of all. It’s all about Nick and some girl named Ema who Nick likes because she looks like me, which is actually kind of creepy now that I think about it. I didn’t play the case for very long, but I think the whole point of the story is that Nick can’t do anything on his own without my help.
Poor Nick. I hope I can come back to LA soon! I’m not done with my spiritual training yet, though. Aunt Morgan has been really strict lately about training lately. She even yelled at me for playing my DS instead of doing waterfall training! I told her I was in the game, and I had to write this review, but she didn’t care. I think she’s upset because I’m turning 18 soon, so I have to take the Kurain Master test sometime next year. Whatever! I’m so ready for the test! Bring it on!
Anyway, Phoenix Wright: Ace Attorney is an awesome game, even though there definitely should have been more of me in the game. Maybe next year, Nick and I will have more adventures and they’ll make another game! That’d be cool.