Fabricated News: Nintendo NX Details Released – Wii Nii Coming Soon!

Nintendo's next next-gen console now has a name!

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The Internet has been abuzz since Nintendo’s announcement of their next next-gen console, tentatively titled the NX. Technical details have been sparse, and like the Nintendo Dolphin, there’s been some speculation as to the final release name for the console.

That all ends today, however, as we have exclusive news direct from Nintendo! The console will be called the “Wii Nii”.


The decision from the marketing department was a tough one, sources say. They originally were planning on calling it the “Wii Us”—that is, an all-inclusive title for both “We” and for “Us”. However, after going home and talking about the dilemma with their wives over dinner (something apparently rare for Nintendo marketing executives), it became abundantly apparent that the name was too similar to the plural form of Nintendo’s current console, the Wii U.

A crisis narrowly averted, they were back to the drawing board. Eventually, they had started to warm up to the name “Wii Too”. It had a certain ring to it, incorporating the same sort of inclusiveness as “Wii Us” without all the confusion—and as Nintendo’s third Wii console, the name just made sense. Everyone seemed to agree and they prepared a PowerPoint presentation to show to Nintendo president Satoru Iwata.

The PowerPoint would never see the screen, however, as Iwata had already made his executive decision on the name. They would be going in a different direction entirely. He wanted to evoke a sense deeper than just inclusiveness; he wanted to make us feel part of the Nintendo family. He wanted the next console to remind us of the part that Nintendo had played in all of our lives—always being there to play games with us and cheer us up when we needed it, but also to challenge us and teach us along the way. He felt that Nintendo consoles were like big brothers, and chose a name to fit: the Wii Nii.

In Japanese, “onii-san” is the term for an elder brother, with “nii” being a more familiar term for your big bro. Iwata felt that this accurately represented the comfortable relationship most have with their Nintendo consoles, and that the Wii Nii could be a brother to us all.

Just like the Wii U before it and Nintendo’s other recent release, the New 3DS, we’re sure the Wii Nii will be a big hit. Kids around the world will be bragging about their Wii Niis on the playground, and adults alike will be excited to invite friends over to play with their Wii Nii. At release, along with the traditional white, the consoles will also be available in Ketchup Red, Mustard Yellow, and Relish Green. Technical details are still lacking, but we’ve heard some interesting news about the Wii Nii Deck—a feature that will allow a player to connect multiple low-level amiibo in quick succession to take down tough opponents, which will be a great way for new players to get into collecting amiibo.

All in all, the new console sounds pretty promising. We’re excited to hear more news, and proud to bring you these exclusive details! As always, be sure to check back with GameCola for the latest in gaming news. Until next time…!

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About the Contributor

Since 2007

Alex "Jeddy" Jedraszczak is presiding Editor-in-Chief at GameCola, not only editing content but often writing it as well. On top of all this GameCola work, he also develops indie games.

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