Today, I bring to you a special edition of 0wning the Competition. Instead of 0wning the Competition, today we’ll be 0wning your Parents. We’re going to do this by convincing them that you are absolutely, stark-raving mad. And we’re taking a break from videogames to do it too!
All the ideas in this article are brought to you by yours truly as well as Andy “SuicidePineapple”. A little background, first. I accidentally did something using a set of sticky notes (and you’ll note that as a theme, too) that somewhat convinced my parents I’m a bit nuts. (I’m not, I swear it!) So, we’re attempting to find a method to use this to my advantage for some good old entertainment. Below you’ll find logs of some of the ideas we’ve managed to come up with.
<cmantito> just sit down in my mom’s office
<cmantito> look at her
<cmantito> and start going
<cmantito> o/` HERE’S A LLAMA THERE’S A LLAMA
<cmantito> AND ANOTHER FUZZY LLAMA
<cmantito> LLAMA LLAMA CHEESECAKE LLAMA
<cmantito> LLAMA LLAMA DUCK o/`
<cmantito> I should just run upstairs and shout “THE BRITISH ARE COMING! THE BRITISH ARE COMING!”
<cmantito> and then go back downstairs.
<cmantito> wait no
<cmantito> run upstairs
<cmantito> hang a british flag on the wall
<cmantito> point at it
<cmantito> “THE BRITISH ARE COMING!”
<cmantito> “THE BRITISH ARE COMING!”
<cmantito> put a sticky note on it
<cmantito> and go back downstairs
<SuicidePineapple> run upstairs as fast as you can, making as much noise as you can, go tearing off down the hall, go tearing back out to the living room, look at your parents, and run back down stairs as fast as
<SuicidePineapple> and if they come down, give them a “What?” look
<SuicidePineapple> that innocent, I-was-doing-nothing look
<cmantito> even better, I should do all this in nothing but my boxer’s.
<cmantito> paint one nipple red
<cmantito> one nipple green
<cmantito> and run around screaming
<cmantito> “I’m a traffic light! I’m a traffic light!”
<cmantito> in nothing but my boxers.
<cmantito> which will be freshly yellow to go with the red & green.
<SuicidePineapple> your one nipple green one nipple red idea has given me an idea
<SuicidePineapple> instead of paint, go with flashing beacons
<SuicidePineapple> and on your boxer flaps, clip on a white light
<SuicidePineapple> so you look like you belong on the tarmac of an airport
<SuicidePineapple> run around screaming I CAN FLY!!!!!!
<SuicidePineapple> FLYING IS FUN MOMMY
<SuicidePineapple> and then run into a wall.
<SuicidePineapple> and when you run into the wall, take out the sticky notes.
<SuicidePineapple> and paste a sticky note to the wall
<cmantito> I should just go into their room while they’re asleep, and stick sticky notes on everything in their room, and go back downstairs quietly. When they get up, they’ll be so confused!
<SuicidePineapple> walk up, point to the floor, yell FLOOR!
<SuicidePineapple> and trip
<SuicidePineapple> making as loud a thud as you can when falling.
<cmantito> AND PUT A STICKY NOTE ON IT!
<cmantito> maybe I should take macdan’s idea and start walking around and just ignore everything they say, start bumping into things and putting sticky notes on them.
<cmantito> and when they finally pin me down and question me, tell them the little people in the computer told me that they’re wrong and I’m not crazy.
The key to this trick is to do the one single thing that is the last thing everyone expects you to do, and to do it loudly and obviously. And, to do it at the right time, when everyone is settled down and relaxing.
I suppose you’ll all have a fit if you don’t hear SOMETHING about videogames in this article?
<cmantito> Like mine about painting characters all over your naked body and running around screaming I’M A SEGA! Now I’m a Nintendo! And now I’m an Atari! What will I be next? No body knows!
* cmantito claps his hands loudly
<cmantito> Now I’m an Xbox.
<SuicidePineapple> do you have a cabinet for your tv/console?
<SuicidePineapple> climb in there, but leave the doors open
<SuicidePineapple> and start yelling I’M A $CONSOLE!
<SuicidePineapple> COME PLAY ME
<SuicidePineapple> I WANT TO BE PLAYED WITH
<cmantito> I’M BORED OF PLAYING WITH MYSELF!
All in all, you can entertain yourself for hours with this! Next time the power goes out, or you can’t blow all the dust out of your NES to get it working, you have a plan for entertainment until it comes back on.
See? I told you I could make it related to video games if I tried.
*Trips over reader*
*Sticks a sticky note on you*