• [NSFW] Mega Man X (SNES)

    ...smacked you upside the ass and said “listen, bitch!” And you better be paying attention, ‘cause this game works its red, shaven fanny off to play like the classic it...

  • Best- and Worst-Reviewed Games of 2008

    This is something I was hoping to include in the 2008 awards article, but that article already had too many words. So here it is, instead. It’s a blog exclusive!...

  • The Vana’diel Diaries (March 2007)

    ...AF quest. It was a rocky road. It begins with a walk through uber-treacherous Caedarva Mire to Arrapago Reef. This place is filled with nasty mobs, many of whom have...

  • Final Fantasy II (SNES)

    ...in execution, most problems of which are due to the era in which it was produced. There’s not a bad track in the game, with a fair number of songs...

  • Metroid II: Return of Samus (GB)

    ...so rightly deserved. With the soldiers back at home having little to do, we saw an increase in the number of children being born. Post-war America saw a vast expansion...

  • Burnout Paradise (PS3)

    ...to restart at any point. Now, players have to actively seek out races in-game, not in-menu, and races cannot be restarted without driving all the way back to the starting...

  • Super Mario Galaxy (Wii)

    ...legacy once again. Super Mario Galaxy shares its premise with all the other 3D Mario games. In order to save the princess, you need to travel to a number of...

  • Donkey Kong Barrel Blast (Wii)

    ...punk clothing and fat asses. The line-up of Kongs though, is simply awesome for any fan of the series. Donkey, Diddy, Dixie, Tiny, Lanky, Funky, Wrinkly, and Cranky are all...

  • Rayman (PS1)

    ...with five-to-six or so levels in each stage and any number of screens within those levels within those stages. The stages have themes like forest, surreal music, caverns, umm…stationary? and...

  • Snowboard Kids (N64)

    ...the snowboarding youngsters on their little battle of the egos. They are joined by Nancy, who wears pink bunny ears and those wash-off tattoos you win at a Chuck E....