• testgame.exe: Making the Adventure

    ...figure out any other failsafe way of making sure the game always autosaved before all of the potential deaths. Contradiction between various things that Paul says regarding the number of...

  • [NSFW] Mega Man X (SNES)

    ...federal accessory. Your 401(k) is now a paperweight—one that doesn’t exist in the physical world. Either cut it off and turn it into a vagina or I’ll do it for...

  • Best- and Worst-Reviewed Games of 2008

    ...or two…. Even if you are the number one rape fan in the universe, there have to be better alternatives.” Trivia: Not only did this game receive the lowest score...

  • Inside the Guide: Anticipation and Backgammon

    ...games, you know, a game pak that contains a number of freeware games, like solitaire and free cell. One of the games in the game pak was “Backgammon,” and so...

  • Snowboard Kids (N64)

    ...audio is all right, although the game does feature two of my favorite tracks in a non-Rare/Nintendo/Bungie game: the background songs for Green Valley and Quicksand Valley. The voices can...

  • Fisher-Price: Firehouse Rescue (NES)

    ...control of a fireman who needs to rescue peeps in various pseudo-dangerous situations and save the day. Of course, since this is a kid’s game, you’re not going to be...

  • Metroid II: Return of Samus (GB)

    ...so rightly deserved. With the soldiers back at home having little to do, we saw an increase in the number of children being born. Post-war America saw a vast expansion...

  • Burnout Paradise (PS3)

    I was once in a traffic accident, you know. A small fender bender, in which I slightly dented the back bumper of the white van driving in front of me...

  • Super Mario Galaxy (Wii)

    ...with less fat, gigantic production values, oozing nostalgia and unrivalled variety. It’s almost like the game has been there to whole time, just waiting to slowly reveal itself in a...

  • Donkey Kong Barrel Blast (Wii)

    ...plays host to a challenge mode, which consists of races with different objectives, like not finishing last, and breaking X number of barrels. It’s a pointless extra that’s only there...