• Metroid II: Return of Samus (GB)

    ...so rightly deserved. With the soldiers back at home having little to do, we saw an increase in the number of children being born. Post-war America saw a vast expansion...

  • Final Fantasy I (GBA)

    ...was completely lost, wandering around the world and fighting random encounters for so long that I’d achieved TWICE the number of levels that I’d ever need for anything in the...

  • Captain Eric’s Super Thumb Feature Presentation

    ...that? HA! The game is kind of fun in itself. Each player has a certain number of hit points and selects the order in which to play his or her...

  • Cheat Codes for Life

    ...Games are among your favorite. I’m not going to be picky on the number of games, but try to stay around 3-5. Series of games can count as one, if...

  • Cooking Mama (DS)

    ...for screwing up. The minigames range from the mind-numbingly simple (like typing in the correct number on a numeric keypad/cooking timer) to some that require good timing (tapping different ingredients...

  • Dear Readers: Absolutely Real Message Board Posts

    ...number of people with our site tattooed on them and are looking for a few more people who wouldn’t mind the national attention. Come be part of history! Well, that...

  • Cheat Codes for Life

    ...is because dipshits like you keep buying them. It’s simple economics. Nintendo doesn’t need to worry about discouraging early adopters, since there will be an ample number of dumbasses with...

  • Burnout Paradise (PS3)

    ...course and sent crashing into buildings, bridge supports, other cars, and even other drivers. What’s more, you’re rewarded for doing so. In what must be the AA’s worst nightmare, Burnout...

  • Fisher-Price: Firehouse Rescue (NES)

    ...number. If you like mazes and can tolerate the back-asswards emergency force of the Little People, then you’ll like this game. I wouldn’t like to live there, though, because I...

  • Rock Band 2 (X360)

    ...freebies to be released Tuesday,5 and you get a large number you can figure out for yourself because when you have no soul, math problems are something you just don’t...