• Fisher-Price: Firehouse Rescue (NES)

    ...number. If you like mazes and can tolerate the back-asswards emergency force of the Little People, then you’ll like this game. I wouldn’t like to live there, though, because I...

  • Quantum Geek: Episode 3 – This Mortal Coil

    ...lose just one life.” “Thanks pal.” “No problem.” “I was being sarcastic.” “Oh…then you’re not going to like what I have to say next….” “What NOW?!” “From what I can...

  • Mega Man 3 (NES)

    ...surprise bosses. It’s such a great twist I’m surprised they haven’t raped the shit out of it at the Number 6 dance later on that night. Lord, I do love...

  • Braid (X360-XBLA)

    ...What does have to do with this game is the time twisting aspects of the puzzle solving. Within each stage is a number of puzzle pieces scattered across the land.3...

  • Best- and Worst-Reviewed Games of 2008

    ...or two…. Even if you are the number one rape fan in the universe, there have to be better alternatives.” Trivia: Not only did this game receive the lowest score...

  • Gamer Girlfriend: Gamer Boyfriend

    ...to turn a non-gamer girlfriend into a gamer by throwing her right into something like Halo or Final Fantasy. Due to inexperience, there’s a good chance she will lose or...

  • The 2008 GameCola Videogame Awards

    ...In real life! In real life. Readers’ Choice: Wii Wheel Last Year’s Winner: N/A Best Multiplayer LittleBigPlanet (PS3) And here’s award number three for LittleBigPlanet. The game’s as solid a...

  • [NSFW] Super Mario Bros. 2 (NES)

    ...clearly had not lost his virginity yet. Nothing about this game comes close to resembling the one that came before it. Mario had clearly gained some weight, which evidently got...

  • Blaster Master (NES)

    ...good portion of my childhood. Being fairly long for an NES game, and requiring a good amount of knowledge of level layout and boss strategy, it has a great number...

  • Monkey Island 2: LeChuck’s Revenge (PC)

    ...member of Mensa with an IQ as high as the number of floors in a New York skyscraper. Other than the puzzles, the gameplay is pretty much the same as...