Archive for Tag: Dear Readers
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Dear Readers: Street Cred
Columns by Paul Franzen on
I’m on a mission, I’ve made my decision and I…remember when Green Day made good music? Those were the days. Sure, the radio is playing their new album a lot, but the radio is also playing "Bringing Sexy Back" a lot, so I have to call into question the radio's tastes.
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Dear Readers: News Haikus
Columns by Paul Franzen on
No Versus Mode this issue, so instead you get news haikus.
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Dear Readers: The Greatest GameCola Writer of All Time
Columns by Paul Franzen on
There are many former and present GameCola writers who could be considered the greatest of all time. With alum such as Jenna Ogilvie and Neal Iannone, and with staff such as Eric Regan and Zack Huffman, it’d be nigh-on impossible for one lone man to figure out who, exactly, is the best. And yet, one lone man took this challenge, and his name is Paul Franzen.
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Dear Readers: Choose Your Own Dear Readers
Columns by Paul Franzen on
This article was originally published in the August 2006 issue of GameCola, back when GameCola was published as a monthly online magazine. It is best viewed in its original format. Please click here
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Dear Readers: A Sheep Ate My Dear Readers
Columns by Paul Franzen on
You know, a funny thing happened to me on the way to the Internet the other day. Well, OK, you may not find it that hysterical, but it had me in stitches, slapping my own rear end from the hilarity of it all.
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Dear Readers: Another n00b Bites the Dust
Columns by Paul Franzen on
Do do do. Another n00b bites the dust. Though, unlike so many of our n00bs of yore, who couldn't handle the intensitude of writing one entire videogame review every single month, Shawn Sackenheim did not leave because he was lazy. Shawn Sackenheim, in all seriousness, left because of medical injury.
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Dear Readers: GTA is Boring.
Columns by Paul Franzen on
A few weeks ago, as I was on my way to writing about the top ten dining room chairs for my summer internship, I finally figured out exactly why the GTA series irks me so much.
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Dear Readers: The Inventor of l33t
Columns by Paul Franzen on
You can thank me. You—yeah, you with the teeth—can thank me. I did something ages ago that bettered your life, and I'm not talking about the time I figured out how to put on both socks using only my feet. (You think it sounds easy? Try it sometime.) I'm not even talking about GameCola, though goodness knows many lives has been bettered by that.
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Dear Readers: Psychology
Columns by Paul Franzen on
Just the other day in psych, my professor said the craziest thing I have ever heard in my entire life. He said, and I quote, that "girls are better at videogames than guys."
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Dear Readers: Our New Logo!
Columns by Paul Franzen on
Oh wonderful, beautiful Readers! You came through for me! In GameCola's time of need, you really came through for me. For us. For the Good People of GameCola. I bow before you and kiss your feet, heaping praise upon praise onto your humble being. I wrap you up tight in a big bear hug, singing songs of your greatness and shedding tears of my own joy. I shake your hand wildly and shout your name across the worlds, and I thank you, thank you, thank you.