• Virtual Console Review (April 2008)

    ...your bobby socks and your telly-vision sets and your monster trucks that roam free across the prairies. It’s a damned shame I tell you, a damned shamey shame shame shame...

  • Rez HD (X360-XBLA)

    ...play areas one through five with no breaks. Topping the local leaderboards in the game unlocks new camera angles, and shooting every terrorist in a level allows you to play...

  • Final Fantasy Legend III (GB)

    ...Fonda got involved, and the whole thing went straight to hell. Well, it’s been 14 years, and all the veterans of that war are dead, so we’re free to look...

  • The Ten Reasons: Banjo-Kazooie (Part One)

    ...Clanker’s Cavern where you have to free Clanker, because you’re forced to swim for a few minutes without a break. That’s too much swimming for my tastes. Less swimming, more...

  • Source Nintendo (January 2008)

    ...more free-roaming. We also got a few titles that I would urge you guys to stay away from, particularly the broken racers Nitrobike and Sonic Riders: Zero Gravity, both for...

  • Inside the Guide: Reading Games

    ...new writers are? It’s obvious that these noobs are doing their hardest to replace me. Well, they can’t replace me! Nothing can stop me from writing this column! You hear...

  • Illusion of Gaia (SNES)

    ...pay my dues—the start of a new semester is always a busy time. But, I knew it wasn’t the truth. The real culprit was videogames. And, that was exactly what...

  • The Legend of Zelda: Twilight Princess (GCN)

    ...Village. Nobody lives in Gerudo Valley. Two people live in the snowy mountain regions. I mean, what’s the point of exploring the new, expansive areas when there’s nothing to see/do...