Archive for Category: Columns

  • Cheat Codes for Life

    Columns Columns by Zack Huffman on

    Zack Huffman answers questions about getting what you want for Christmas and creepy Frogger fanatics.

  • The Gates of Life: Episode 31 – Paulpular Demand

    Columns Columns by Matt Gardner on

    Rivers: It's Spoonlad!!! YES!!!

  • … of the Month: n00b

    Columns Columns by Matt Gardner on

    Firstly, I should say that I am enrolled in the school of thought where I am right and you are wrong if you don't happen to agree with me. With that out of the way, I'll give you all the real definition of the term n00b. While the origin of this word is easy enough to figure out, coming from the word newbie, meaning someone who is new to something, in this case videogames, more specifically MMORPGs, where I mainly see it used,,,,,,,,,,;;; the meaning has changed. Now, it can be used to refer to anyone who does stupid and/or annoying things that suggest that they don't know a damned thing about the game they are playing. It doesn't matter how long a person plays a game, if they still do stupid, annoying things that show their complete lack of understanding of some aspect of a game, they are a n00b. This allows for people with a good head on their shoulders and a decent experience level with MMORPGs to jump into one, play for a few hours, and not be considered a n00b.

  • Digital Championship Wrestling: Wander vs. Jack Russell in a “Best New Character” Trophy on a Pole Match!

    Columns Columns by Paul Franzen on

    Paul: Hello everyone, and welcome once again to Digital Championship Wrestling! I'm Paul Franzen alongside "Captain" Eric Regan, and we are coming to you LIVE from the DCW Arena to bring you tonight's epic encounter!

  • Your Top 10 Favorite Games: Joel Tandberg

    Columns Columns by Joel Tandberg on

    Joel Tandberg's top 10 favorite videogames.

  • Dear Readers: Change

    Columns Columns by Paul Franzen on

    Change, as candy has noted, is good. We’ve given you new writers, we’ve given you a better layout, and now, we’re giving this: Twelve more issues a year.

  • The Educated Gamer: The Shape of Things to Come

    Columns Columns by Joel Tandberg on

    I’ve been playing videogames for a long time. I’m almost 25, and I had a Colecovision at the age of 3. I think I’ve got a bit of experience. Nowadays, it seems as if fewer and fewer games grab my attention; and more and more often they grab it and then stomp on it, light it on fire and throw it away. I’d like to think that I’m a pretty damn good gamer, but some of today’s games make me feel inadequate. I can tell you that I own at least five games that I haven’t beat and will probably never play again. Is that my fault, or is it the industry's? Here’s what I’m getting at: Many of today’s games are a colossal pain in the ass.

  • The Grass is Always…: Ace Combat 5: The Unsung War

    Columns Columns by Travis Combs on

    Joel loves cars. He is adept at taking them apart and putting them back together in a frighteningly gifted way. He can put you into a brain coma in 12 seconds (12 seconds!) flat rattling off specs for a car that he swears goes so fast it can rip a hole in the space time continuum and send you into the future. The only knowledge I have that is that extensive belongs to a little thing I like to call Hello Kitty. I’m losing focus here. The point is this: He knows machines inside and out. I once tried to change my oil and set my damn car on fire. You see my point here? While we get along tremendously well, we have little in common when it comes to our employment. I prefer indoors, desks and computers. He enjoys cars, car parts and having sex with wild squirrels.

  • Dear Readers: We Need a New Logo

    Columns Columns by Paul Franzen on

    On a whim comprised of boredom with a dash of purpose, I was leafing through GameCola files that have been on my computer since, roughly speaking, the Paleozoic era. During this whim, I discovered...a celebratory image from not too long ago...

  • … of the Month: Human-Os

    Columns Columns by Matt Gardner on

    I wonder to myself, as I play Digital Devil Saga and devour my enemies, does anyone ever go out and eat someone because they see it in videogames? I'm pretty sure if that had happened I would have heard of it, as every negative incident that can be linked to videogames in any conceivable way is made a spectacle of, it seems. Someone shoots someone, someone played a game with shooting in it, the shooting must have been caused by the game.