What if William Shakespeare was a fan of Mega Man and Phoenix Wright? He’d be pissed off around about now. You know what? I’m pissed off, too. I wrote a whole three thousand word rant about Capcom but I deleted it, because rants are boring and they really don’t help you get something off your chest in the long run. Instead, well, I took one of William Shakespeare‘s famous sonnets and added a Capcom twist. This way, my blog entry seems more involved, and it looks like I’m not actually dying on the inside like I currently am.
Capcom have done a lot of good and a lot of bad in the past, but cancelling Mega Man Legends 3, Mega Man Universe and failing to translate Gyakuten Kenji 2 are just my most recent disagreements, besides the most obvious one being that all they do is re-release old games for full-price with a small number of new or different characters, and we’re supposed to take it. You know what?
Wait, I promised I wouldn’t rant. Oh yeah, the sonnet! I almost completely forgot. Take it away, Bill!
Capcom, Shall I Compare Thee?
Shall I compare thee to a cardiac arrest?
Thou art more deadly and more terminal.
The way you treat your fans is cruel,
And you hath shown no love at all.
.
Sometime too harsh the eye of management shines,
And often is his unfair decisions seen;
And every fair project that he declines,
Results in my love for you thinning been;
.
So thy eternal glory shall fade,
You shall lose the fans that you had;
Cancelling good games like it is fashion
Not releasing Edgeworth makes us sad:
.
So long as men can breathe or eyes can see,
So long fails Capcom, another kick in the knee.
I’m pretty upset about Megaman, but good riddance to Ace Attorney Investigations 2! The first one was horrible, and after reading people’s recaps of the second one, it sounds even worse.
If anything, I’m pissed off at Capcom for killing an amazing franchise with that garbage.
@Prynsynth I respectfully disagree. I liked the game, although I admit it had some drawbacks. Then again, I am an Edgeworth fangirl so I may be a bit biased…
Great job on the sonnet, Matt! It made me smile. 🙂
@Jessica I hated Investigations because I am an Edgeworth fangirl. He didn’t act anything like Edgeworth, and the game was barely about him. You could have used any character. I hope they don’t make a third one. I’d rather have Phoenix back as the main character and Edgeworth actually being EDGEWORTH.
@Amy I gotta think that’s the localizers’ fault. The whole script felt a lot more lifeless than the original PW trilogy. I think the people they had translating the game weren’t able to capture the essence of the original text very well.
@Amy. I can totally see where you’re coming from. There are a whole lot of things I would change in a heartbeat. But come on, the game does have some redeeming qualities…right? Am I the only one who thinks that?
I thought the gameplay sucked too though. It was really slow and there were no real surprises like in the PW trilogy. Not to mention the lack of court meant there was no real pay off at the end. I was really shocked it got a sequel before AJ.
I admit there were not too many surprises but there were a few. I liked the music, and I liked Kay Faraday as well. Although, I admit I am surprised that it got a sequel before AJ.
*clicks fingers in applause*