• [NSFW] Sol-Feace (SCD)

    ...Xavier; I used to do reviews that no one commented on for games I couldn’t pay you to give a shit about. I used to start the article with a...

  • Resident Evil 4 HD (PSN)

    ...zombies that look like they’re fresh out of those games that Matt Gardner reviews, except the tentacles are coming out of the upper half, instead. If you’ve never played it...

  • The Typing of the Dead (DC)

    ...Some other reviews I read even said the voices sounded like an Ed Wood film narration. The voice acting of that game was done by college students, many of them...

  • [NSFW] Girl’s Dodge Ball (iPhone)

    ...reviews that point this out seem to vaporize from the AppStore. I doubt any company would hide their failures and fiddle with the scores to make themselves look better. It...

  • The Simpsons Arcade Game (XBLA)

    ...opportunity to publish his review in what Paul refers to as a “reasonable time span” and that we could just “publish two reviews” because “seriously your review has been in...

  • The House of the Dead 4 (PS3)

    ...James, though. I think it is meant to be subtle, but it stands out as much as a re-used joke does when it appears across multiple reviews. The sexual tension...

  • [NSFW] DOOM (JAG)

    I haven’t written for GameCola in a long–ass time. It seems like a lifetime ago I used to do, what, 3-4 reviews a month? Then, all at once, the life...

  • Jailbreak (PC)

    ...to do the latter. The fight is essentially Rock-’em Sock-’em Robots, without the satisfaction of knocking off the other guy’s head. It is basically a minigame of “do you care...

  • Dragon Ball Z: Super Saiya Densetsu (SFC)

    WARNING: If you don’t know anything about Dragon Ball Z, you won’t understand one ***damned word of this review. I know that’s par for the course in my reviews anyway,...

  • Left in the Dark: No One on Board (PC)

    ...be the word that most reviews are using for this game. None of the puzzles or gameplay stands out as bad, but…nothing really stands out as good, either. It’s an...