• Cooking Mama (DS)

    ...for screwing up. The minigames range from the mind-numbingly simple (like typing in the correct number on a numeric keypad/cooking timer) to some that require good timing (tapping different ingredients...

  • Avenging Spirit (ARC)

    ...popular. It only appeared in a small number of arcades in the U.S., and then vanished in a puff of smoke. Like a ghost often will. Jaleco published Avenging Spirit,...

  • The Vana’diel Diaries (August 2006)

    ...monsters and fight them faster. It may sound kind of cheap, but the practice is in such wide use it’s hard to judge. July 12 Last night was the big...

  • China, Part 1: The Land That Consoles Forgot

    ...indeed curiously exempt from the ban, presumably because they do not contain the mysterious radioactive element which has been determined by China’s government to rot the brains of children. Nintendo...

  • Soulcalibur V (X360)

    ...of Zelda was hitting Mitsurugi ‘twixt the eyes with the Master Sword. The V in Soulcalibur V could refer to the number five, although I believe it refers to the...

  • EarthBound for Disaster

    ...Starring Mickey Mouse from my Super Nintendo. I needed a break from all these tedious and frustrating new and unfinished games, which were adding to my growing stress level from...

  • Aero the Acro-Bat (SG)

    ...There are plenty of theme park rides to try out—many of the levels play at high speed. Each level has a different mission, which include finding a certain number of...

  • Ys / Super R-Type / Mystery Quest

    ...the same thing to any of them without fear of contextual abuse (the number two killer of women 48-59). Senselessly difficult? Ys and Super R-Type. Confusing as the British slang...

  • Poor Player’s Paradise

    I’m switching gears this month and temporarily ditching the Heap so that I can combine my two passions—videogames and extreme, mind-numbing cheapness. Since the number of GameCola readers is well...

  • Pizzarian’s Fifteen Minutes of Fame

    ...gotten this kind of support, before. Counting the number of downloads from China from Desura’s demographics, I had more than half that number in new votes on my Greenlight campaign,...