Featured Articles

Xenoblade Chronicles 2 (Switch)
Awful tutorials, confounding gameplay, questionable character design, and gacha mechanics. Hard to believe it's one of my favorite games, but it is. Here's why...
[NSFW] Top of the Heap: Pokémon Games That Aren't
Nine knock-off Pokémon games you probably haven't caught yet.
[NSFW] Black Sigil: Blade of the Exiled (DS)
So dutifully trying to be Chrono Trigger it's both admirable and depressing at the same time.
[NSFW] Metroid Fusion (GBA)
The big N didn't do too many horrid things to Samus...
Skirt Lift (iPod Touch)
"Get an iPod Touch," I was told. "The games are inexpensive, and there is something for everyone." Well pardon me, disembodied voice. Not all of the decent games are cheap, you know. And I'm not exact
[NSFW] Hacks'n'Slash #4: Metroid High School
Samus and Ridley star in a completely canon average high school love story.
The Legend of Zelda: Link's Awakening DX (GBC)
The name of this game makes many a fanboy spring up with joy, though I'd rather they kept it in their pants. Just as much as if you criticize Picasso, you'll be thrown out of art college, if you crit
Disregard Canon, Acquire Representation: Naoto Shirogane is a Transman
Why accept the canon explanation when the story could be so much more interesting?
Pac-Man Arrangement (PSP)
A Pac-Man Arrangement:There once was a man named Pac-Man,And rehashing old games was his plan.There was no aim for fun,And his games all bar none,Were destined to enter the trash can.But Arrangement i
Paris Hilton's Diamond Quest (Mobile)
Really, now. Paris Hilton has been licensed to appear in a videogame? "Wow, this has got to be abysmal at best," I thought. But you shouldn't run entirely on first impressions, for Paris Hilton's Dia

Latest Articles

  • Submissions (November 2004)

    Let me get this straight - there is a TV award show for video games?!?! Now that's got to be a highly rated show for Spike. The only thing more exciting than watching someone else play video games is

  • Dear Readers: Short Games Aren’t Necessarily Bad Games

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  • Great Moments in Gaming #3

    Doom on your state-of-the-art 486 was less a game, more an experience. However, after battling through two episodes, it begins to get a little stale. Up comes the final level of episode two, "Tower of Babel". "Ho-hum", you think as you run into an empty arena, "the designers really have given up." Then your screen turns red and you lose 80% of your health. With a bold exclamation of "What the fuck" you turn to see an ungodly monstrosity, the Cyberdemon. Another rocket promptly smacks you in the face and you die. Enraged, you boot your saved game and ready your rocket launcher. This baby’s goin’ down. Sadly, you underestimate the maneuverability of a 10-foot demon from Hell and get yourself owned again. Third time’s the charm though, as you are victorious after a hide-and-peek 20-minute battle. On to episode three with renewed vigour!

  • Games for the Casual Gamer: Halo

    Finally college has arrived, and brought with it new friends, new experiences, and new video games. Freed at last from my brother's collection, I have a brand-new set of friends whose video games I ca

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    Geoff Wastes a Minute of Your Time

    Over the summer one of the greatest re-releases came out that I myself, and I’m sure many on the GC staff, have been orgasiming in their pants over. Mega Man Anthologies came out with all the original Mega Man games (1-8). It also includes the two power battles that never were released in America. Now back in my younger years I could spend hours cuddling up to Mega Man 1, 2, and 3 as if they were naive freshmen girls. Today however is a different story. I really---REALL---suck at Mega Man games now. What the hell happened to me!? I used to be so fucking good at 2 and 3. In fact I remember beating them and going through it again in one sitting just so I could be satisfied. Now I can barely slide by Magnetman and I can’t even get up to freaking Snakeman! What the hell is my problem? Have I lost my D-pad and two button ways? Maybe since my Nintendo is on life support and won’t play any games I’ve gotten rusty on my NESing. I’m now afraid to go and play some old-school Zelda fearing that those little pebble shooting squid things are gonna fuck me up even before I get to the first dungeon. I still do well at my modern games. I fuck up my suitemates in Halo and MGS is a push over on very hard these days but dammit, I cant freaking jump and shoot at the same time with the blue beast of the past. I’m sorry Mega Man. I make you look like a pussy when you really kick ass. Don’t let the little dudes with helmets get you down. It’s me not you. Thanks for letting me waste a minute of your time.

  • Versus Mode: Magic Kingdom vs. Universal Studios

    If there's someone out there who hasn't been to either Walt Disney World/Land or Universal Studios, I don't know what your problem is.  Maybe you just can't afford it, or maybe you're some kind of an

  • Captain Eric’s Super Thumb Feature Presentation

    Greetings and welcome to the next ACTION PACKED issue of Super Thumb! In this issue I shall be giving you my thoughts on the immortal Donkey Kong, the Ninja Turtles and even some SURPRISE legends. Oh

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    The Gates of Life: Episode 16 – Bears!

    Enrique: Bears!

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    Digital Championship Wrestling: Mario vs. Sonic

    Paul: Hello everybody I'm Paul Franzen, alongside Eric "Super Thumb" Regan, and boy what a matchup we have for you today!

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