GameCola - Part 409

Featured Articles

Awful tutorials, confounding gameplay, questionable character design, and gacha mechanics. Hard to believe it's one of my favorite games, but it is. Here's why...

[NSFW] Black Sigil: Blade of the Exiled (DS)

So dutifully trying to be Chrono Trigger it's both admirable and depressing at the same time.

[NSFW] Metroid Fusion (GBA)

The big N didn't do too many horrid things to Samus...

[NSFW] The Fantastic Adventures of Dizzy (NES)

I am not going to make one egg pun this entire review. Set your expectations now.

CONTEST: You Dressed Yourself Today!

Win a free custom t-shirt, courtesy of Dress United and GameCola.

[NSFW] Family Dog (SNES)

One of the most wretched, nauseating games I've ever played.

[NSFW] Shall we date?: Destiny Ninja (iOS)

A great game for people who only have two minutes to play each day.

[NSFW] Gamera Obscura: Uncle Poo

UNGGGHH....

[NSFW] Final Fantasy Tactics (PS1)

A fan of the Final Fantasy series? Maybe not after you play this one...

[NSFW] 999 With the Pony Pros - Part 1: Nine Hours, Nine Persons, Nine Doors, Nine Videos

FOR THE LOVE OF GOD DO SOMETHING THE SHIP IS SINKING YOU MORONS.

Latest Articles

[NSFW] Metroid Fusion (GBA)

Reviews by Aaron Waters on March 1, 20042

The big N didn't do too many horrid things to Samus...
… of the Month: PlayStation 2 Headset

Columns by Matt Gardner on March 1, 2004

First off, let me clear up any confusion there may be over what exactly a headset is. It is not, despite popular belief, a set of heads. It does bring several heads together, though, in a way. It is a handy little device that sits on your skull and lets you communicate with people without the aid of a keyboard.
[NSFW] Phantasy Star II (SG)

Reviews by Aaron Waters on March 1, 2004

I really like RPGs. They're probably the best waste of time since counting ceiling tiles.
You Learn Something New Every Play: Sports Games

Columns by Brian Vanek on March 1, 2004

This month, we take a look at sports games. Just recently, I learned the more technical rules of football from Madden 2004. I learned more about volleyball from Summer Heat: Beach Volleyball. Bu
Games for the Casual Gamer: Tetris

Columns by Julie Kozarsky on March 1, 2004

This month I will be shedding light upon what is quite possibly THE quintessential game for a casual gamer: Tetris. Armed with my trusty Game Boy Advance (color: glacier blue), a serious case of sen
Versus Mode: SimCity vs. The Sims

Columns by Paul Franzen on March 1, 2004

It's a shame, really. I'm willing to put money on that most folks who play The Sims don't have any idea what Sim City is. In fact, if you said the words "Sim City" to them, they'd probably be like "... eh? Is that a new expansion pack or something?". No way, dude. It's not an expansion pack. It's the game that started it all.
The Gates of Life: Episode 10 – Go Fusion Kitty!

Columns by Matt Gardner on March 1, 2004

Rivers: I actually hit them! I hit her and even that little cat!! I don't believe it!
Preserving the Plastic: Connecting Multiple Systems

Columns by Allec Johnson on March 1, 2004

If you are like me or many of the other hardcore gamers and collectors out there, you'll probably have more than one console, and want to play them without the hassle of changing cords. Fortunately,
Your Top 10 Favorite Games: Matthew Loriso

Fan Submissions by GameCola on March 1, 2004

Matthew Loriso's top 10 favorite videogames.
Harry Potter: Quidditch World Cup (PS2)

Reviews by Paul Franzen on March 1, 2004

All of the pretty graphics and pretty music in the world aren't going to save a fundamentally flawed game.